Widening Your Window of Tolerance

When we begin a relationship at work, a 'Window of Tolerance' opens.

In a work context, think of this Window of Tolerance as the behavioural zone within which everything feels healthy, safe, and productive.

Coined by Daniel J. Siegel, the term is really a metaphor to describe the optimal emotional “zone” we can exist in, to best function and thrive in everyday life.

In a relational work context, when all is well, and you’re in your Window of Tolerance, you are:

> In a regulated state
> You have good executive functioning and so can give and receive directions, seek clarification, take risks, learn from failure, explore healthy conflict
> You are cognizant of various the boundaries and agreements in effect around you, including your own.

Our Windows expand and contract. Daily. Monthly. Yearly.

Always in flux, the wider our Window, the better we're able to cope, and stay calm during our work day.

Naturally, many, many things impact and influence how Windows shift between two or more people.

So, how can you positively stay inside (or even widen) your own Window, and help others to do the same?

Here are 3 things to consider:

1. When you’re calm and within your window, notice how you feel, how you are showing up.

2. What (projects, tasks, deadlines) or who (boss, client, co-worker, staff) typically helps you to stay within your window? What/who pushes you out of it? Knowing this, what can you control or influence, that will help you stay in your Window, or better still, widen it?

3. What can you do to support others with whom you work closely to stay within their Window of Tolerance?

In the end, it's about growing your self-awareness--of what expands or contracts your Window--which will help you to remain inside it more often.