Why you make time for the things you want

Does this resonate?

Let’s get curious. Why do we all do this?

Allow me to cast you as the main character in a little a story…

Last month, you didn’t read the chosen novel for your bookclub. You didn’t have the time. You tried! Twice.

The truth is…

You just couldn’t get into it. The days slipped by. You were busy. (That work deadline, the thing with the neighbours, global inflationary pressures, etc.)

Except … when you weren’t busy.

And, when you weren’t busy, you did other things. Things that were not reading the novel. Because, on some level, you’d decided you were not going to read it. You ran the clock down and had to admit, your inaction was a choice.

But, then something beautiful happened.

You forgave yourself. Once you’d admitted this to yourself, you stopped feeling bad about not reading the book, and you just let it go. It’s just one book. It’s only a month. No big deal.

Time has no feelings

When we say “I don’t have the time” too often we are externalizing the blame because we don’t want it placed on ourselves.

So, our shortcomings and indecisions conveniently become the fault of “time” or how “busy” we are. As if time gets personified, granted human agency, and so it’s Time who’s not letting you complete tasks you’d otherwise happily do.

Like: Hey, were it not for wretched Time being so stingy I’d have read this novel! Yeah, why is Time being so mean to me?

Of course, thinking like this is the real fiction here.

Here’s the thing: sometimes you just don’t want to grind through a book that doesn’t charm you from page one. So you don’t.

But, when you don’t, it’s not the fault of “time” or being too busy. It’s not about blame. It just means that you didn’t make it a priority.

And, this is the real issue. Personal accountability. If it’s a book for a bookclub, then that’s okay. But, if it’s something more important to you as a leader—then, that’s a place to do some deeper wondering. What’s going on? Who’s the boss of your time? What are your priorities trying to tell you?

So my coaching question this month:

Where do you blame “not having enough time,” and what’s really going on there for you?